reminscing yet looking forward

Standing under a scanner darkly...phishhhh....buzzz......static...... mounds and mounds of white sand, blue horizon, sparkling blue water and waves lapping, tickling my feet. Perfect setting for a holiday, solace, solitude and loneliness????? Pondering, wondering, reminiscing.....dhum dhish dhishum.....

Clap!!!! muhurat shot....life in a big city.... shudders, palpitation, sweaty palm and more..... breathless anticipation.... writing, thinking, changing garbs, getting into the skin of many characters.....psychopaths, serial killers, religious men.... what bracket does my character fit in...... another round of static.....phishh...buzz...static again.....

Intellectualizing and farting away..... the big questions of life....why am i here???? What is the bigger divine plan chalked out for me....Complexity in character is essential...complexity in simplicity and simplicity in complexity.... all boils down to the same thing..... The screen play should be interesting enough to retain interest.... what how???? wonder wonder ponder....

Skin soft like a baby's tush googly woogly mush...... sense of humour .....dude i tell myself...retain yours and all will be well....Exaggerated fucking self importance..... Humour humour find that all will be well..... Aaaaaa..... a screaming minds,,,,, spiraling thoughts.... Somewhere between looking forward and glancing backwards; the today vanished somehow....somewhere......!!!!!!

Inculcating promiscuity of thought...... dude lighten up.... turn your mind into a whore........ see fat dicks, dark dicks, small dicks, hairy ones and the leaning tower of pisa ones'....... get what you wanted out of bargain and fuck off..... wondering, pondering..... what do i want out of the bargain..... phishhhh....buzzzz....static...